My time in quarantine is soon over
Tomorrow I'm free again to walk to the store or visit friends.
Luckily my test was negative and I didn`t have Corona or any signs of it either.
I have used my time well in my quarantine. I have gone on some longer walks with the dog (at a good distance from others of course), gone through some old photos, seen some good movies and slept when it suited me.
But the most important thing is that I finally "finished" my self-portrait.
I'll probably never finish anything I make, but I have to stop somewhere.
The self-criticism of my work, can quickly take off, and I dont post everything I make. Many drawings and paintings are half-finished in a corner, because I simply got tired of the project, or that the project didn`t go quite as I wanted or that I found something else that I wanted to spend time on...
It's not everything I make that I feel is worthy of shedding light on.
“Check out this crapy project of mine that I managed not to finish. Just look how much self-discipline I have… NOT! ”
It's not exactly the way I want to be perceived. A hopeless artist who has no self-discipline etc.
You post almost all the time the best of the best on social media. We all do it. Post only the highlights of our life. What's going well!
I want the art I make to be optimal in relation to my standards. Some may call me a perfectionist, but I like to push myself.
At the same time, it`s important to show you everything as well. Both what I am happy with, and what I am less happy with.
Then I show you the whole picture, not just the little pieces where things works well. The truth is quite different.
Life in general is a dance on roses, because the roses have thorns.
As an artist, you step on thorns several times during the day when working on a project. Personally, I can quickly get tired of the emotional stuff I encounter in myself and over concentrating so much on what I do.
I like to compare drawing or painting with surfing.
When you are in the "zone" and are able to stand on the board, it`s as if time stands still. The feeling makes you high, but you can fall off it any time. But it is in those moments when you are in the zone, that you become one with everything. That's when you finally get a vacation from your own head and from your worries. Nothing is better than that feeling.
When I fall off the wave, I can fall so hard that I have to take a long break from all the drawing and painting, before I want to continue again. If I push too much, I won`t end up in the zone no matter how much I want it. It must come naturally. You can`t push it either and if I do, the joy can quickly disappear. Then the point is gone.
I can feel that it goes very well one day, but the next day I suddenly feel the exact opposite. It's like an eternally big wave, but it's those moments when Im in the zone (in the middle), that make all the effort worth it. When the perfect balance occurs.
Did you know that meditation means "in the middle"?!
- Hugs from meg :)
- Kristina